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Aha Moments: Couples Question Deck
Questions that help two people know each other even better, for a date night, an anniversary, or a quiet evening together.
- The cardsA PDF you print at home, cut, and fold, plus a screen version and phone pictures
- The guideA listening guide for asking, following up, and saving the stories
$19
Your download link arrives by email the moment you pay. You have seven days to change your mind.
- Card fronts
- Four questions a card
- Easy to deep
- Print at home
- A screen deck
- Phone pictures
- A listening guide
- A follow-up on every card
The sweetest stories come out when your partner asks.
Every couple carries stories that never come up on a busy weeknight: how you met, the first date, a hard season you came through together, or the home you dream about.
Each card in this deck holds one theme, like How We Met, Little Things, or Our Someday. Turn the card over and you find four questions that start easy and go deeper, plus one follow-up to keep the story going.
Download the file, print the cards, cut them out, and fold each one in half. The screen version and the phone pictures come with it, so the deck can come along to dinner or on a long drive.
The deck works for married, engaged, and dating couples, and it has questions for couples who are expecting a baby. It makes a lovely gift for an anniversary, a wedding, or Valentine’s Day.
I turned user research into questions for two people in love.
For more than twenty years, my work in product research has been about asking good questions and listening closely to the answers. The same skills that help a team understand the people they design for help a couple understand each other.
Every card follows the shape of a good interview: easy questions first, deeper questions next, and a gentle follow-up at the end. Nobody has to answer every question, and every answer is a good one.
More question decks are ready too: Family, Your Team at Work, Couples, Friends, and School.
See the front of every card in the deck.
See every cardShow fewer cards
Print your own deck, and keep a copy on every screen.
Print at homeFold-over cards, front and back side by side, four to a page.Print at HomePrintable PDF
Print on regular paper or card stock, cut along the edge, and fold each card in half. You get a real deck without waiting for the mail.
Play on a screenEvery card, front and back, sized for a laptop or a TV.Screen DeckPDF
Share your screen in a meeting or a classroom, and turn the page to turn the card.
Keep it on your phoneA picture of the front and the back of every card.Phone picturesJPG images
Save the pictures to your photos, and you always have a card with you, in line, on a walk, or between meetings.
Listen wellHow to ask, follow up, and save the stories you hear.Listening GuidePrintable PDF
Read the guide before your first date night with the deck. It shows how to ask, when to wait, and simple ways to save a story you both want to keep.
What is true when you finish the deck.
- You heard a story your partner had never told you.
- Date night had something better than small talk.
- You both remembered why you fell in love.
- You talked about the future with fresh ideas.
- You saved a few stories for your family to keep.
- Every question was easy to ask, because the card did the asking.
Hi, I’m Ashley.
I have worked for more than twenty years in accessibility, trust and safety, and product research and design. I helped create many of the systems our day-to-day lives depend on: banking, payments, identity, and fraud protection. One of my roles was vice president of product research at JPMorgan Chase, and I hold a master’s degree in human factors and systems engineering.
I write books, teach, and build good products. Whatever brought you here, I’m glad you came.
Ashley
Read my storyYou have questions, and I have plain answers.
How do I get the files?
The moment you pay, an email arrives with your download link. Save the files to your own computer and phone. There is no account to create and nothing to log back into.
How do I print the cards?
Open the Print at Home PDF and print it on standard paper. Card stock feels best, and regular paper works too. Cut each card out and fold it in half, and the front and back line up.
Who is the deck for?
Couples at any stage: married, engaged, or dating. A set of cards is just for couples who are expecting a baby, and every question is kind and easy to skip.
How is this different from the membership?
This deck is a download you keep and print, so you hold real cards in your hands. The Aha Moments membership is $5 a month, and it lets you play the Aha Moments cards online at havensmith.company/aha.
Is there a printed deck?
A printed deck is coming later. For now, the download lets you print your own cards today.
Can I share the files?
Play with as many people as you like. Please keep the files for yourself and the people you play with, and send friends here to get their own copy.
Can I get a refund?
Yes. Read it, try it, and if it is not what you wanted, write within seven days of buying it. A real person will get back to you soon with your refund.